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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29340363">Always Supposedly Time</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNerdyTurtle96/pseuds/TheNerdyTurtle96'>TheNerdyTurtle96</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hermitcraft RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>&gt;:), ALL THE ANGST, Angst, F/M, False is aroace, Hanahaki Disease, I’ll just stop here, Oneshot, Sad Ending, Unrequited Love, can You figure out the story from the tags yet?, non canon backstory, not a self-insert</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:34:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,025</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29340363</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNerdyTurtle96/pseuds/TheNerdyTurtle96</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It wasn’t fair.</p><p>Life wasn’t fair.</p><p>The universe was cruel.</p><p>The universe was random.</p><p>There was always time.</p><p>There was always supposedly time.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Original Male Character/FalseSymmetry (Unrequited)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Always Supposedly Time</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>For the weeks surrounding Valentine’s Day, I’m going to hit both common moods: single and mellow, and sweet and romantic. This is the single and sad.</p><p>This is the Hanahaki fic that nobody on this fandom has posted yet. So I did. Axiomcraft is not an actual server, and if it is, I’m not referring to it. I just made it up for storytelling purposes. Brownie points if you can guess why I picked that name. </p><p>Also, read the tags. Please and thank you.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Contrary to what the others may have thought, Xisuma was actually pretty good about taking care of himself. He was on a regular sleep schedule, made sure to eat and drink plenty of water, and got lots of exercise. However, when he got invested in a project, the concept of time sometimes abandoned him. That’s where the others got their perception that was constantly overworking himself.</p><p>
  <span>This one particular time, it was False who found him. There were a few bugs with mob behavior that simply refused to be fixed, and he had been hacking away at the problem in his admin console room for much longer than he had thought. The woman had stepped inside the room so quietly that he hadn’t even noticed she was there until she waved a hand in front of his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello? World to Xisuma?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Breaking out of his thoughts, Xisuma rapidly shook his head a few times before focusing on False.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <span>Oh my goodness me, I didn’t see you there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Evidently not. I’ve been here for almost five minutes,” she smirked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Uh, do you need something?” he sheepishly asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you lose track of time again?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” the admin admitted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s wrong now?” she inquired with a raised eyebrow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mob generation around Doc’s base is all screwy. I’ve been meaning to fix it for a while, but whatever is causing the problem is really tough to find,” Xisuma explained.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm. Want me to take a look at it?”</span>
</p><p>“Sure,” he shrugged.</p><p>
  <span>“In the meantime, go eat something and drink a bottle of water,” False instructed, already settling into the chair in front of the admin consoles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He followed her orders quite compliently, then wandered back into the room about ten minutes later. Sitting in that chair and typing out commands, she looked rather peaceful. It was almost the same look she had on her face while in the middle of a duel. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Many years ago after an accident, Xisuma had decided to give minor admin powers to several other hermits. Each one that was selected was happy to take up a little more responsibility and go through a bit of training. False was one of them, and though he had never truly needed the other admins to take over, he completely trusted that they would be fine in the case of an emergency. Seeing the warrior like this only made him more confident in his decision.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Xisuma had been mesmerized watching her work, so he was a bit shocked when the spell finally broke with a triumphant shout. False grinned, rubbed her hands together, and rapidly typed out several more commands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, I might have fixed it!” she cheered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After glancing over all of his displays, the admin concurred.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How did you do it? I’ve been working on that for hours and barely got anywhere!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Took me a minute to figure it out, but there are multiples of every file. Only one actually fixes the behavior; you were just using the wrong one. All of your commands were correct, though,” she explained, a huge grin residing on her face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Man, you need to be helping me more often,” he remarked. “Say, how did you learn your admin skills in the first place? I remember that I never had to teach you much; you just already seemed to know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s a long story,” False sighed, “but I’ll tell it to you if you promise to go to sleep right afterwards.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh yes, I will,” he pledged, lowering himself to the ground and folding neatly into a criss-cross applesauce position. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All right,” she chuckled, leaning back in her chair. “The story starts many, many years ago on my old server. It was never very well known, but I have so many good memories of Axiomcraft. This particular story isn’t that happy, though…”</span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>False was 20 years old and perfectly satisfied with her life. Ever since graduating from high school, she had had a wonderful home on the Axiomcraft server. The admin, Amory, was one of her best friends from high school, and everyone on the server was her friend. As a whole, they were fairly young, so a lot of time was dedicated to learning new skills. It was like going to college, but a hundred times more fun.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In her two years there, she had learned all about architecture, martial arts, drawing and design, and creative writing. She didn’t particularly care for or understand the electrical engineering classes that some of her friends took to like fish to water. It didn’t really matter, though, as she just had to ask one of them for help any time she needed that type of work done. In return, they would ask for her to draw up building plans for them to actually have a place to put all of their contraptions in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>On this server, she had also begun to show love to herself, the one person she always neglected throughout high school. With some help, she eventually figured out that she was aromantic and asexual, and those two labels truly set her free. She had come to terms with the fact that life for her wouldn’t include love, and that was perfectly fine. All the more time to spend building, designing, and being creative.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>One beautiful May day, Amory asked her to come over and have lunch. They always had dumplings and movie nights on Fridays, but a request to meet on this short notice was unheard of. Amory always sent out his invitations days ahead of time, not wanting to disrupt other plans people may have already made.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thus, despite the warm sun smiling upon her face and the faint aroma of budding trees surrounding her, False walked rather cautiously down to Amory’s cottage. She rapped three times on the door and stepped back to wait for his cheerful self to greet her. Instead, there was silence for almost a whole minute before a disheveled and pale Amory with his short black hair in a complete mess opened the door, leaning heavily on the doorframe for support.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Falsie,” he panted, his normally olive skin now appearing as white as a ghost.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Amory, are you okay?” she quickly asked, panic running through her veins at the sight of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Better than earlier,” he sighed. “Just come inside, and I’ll explain over lunch.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slowly and wide-eyed, False stepped over the threshold of the door, arms subconsciously a little off her side and prepared to catch Amory in case he suddenly fell. Thankfully, he somehow managed to stagger over to a chair and collapse onto the seat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ammy, I’ll take care of lunch,” she stated.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright,” he weakly nodded. “Tray’s on the counter.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>False hurried over to the little kitchen and retrieved a wooden tray with tea and sandwiches on top. She set it down on the coffee table in the living room and pulled over a chair so that she was seated right across from Amory. It was rather worrying that Amory wasn’t protesting at her doing so much for him; normally he would be insisting that he was just fine and that as a gentleman, he should be the one serving False.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had been over for tea time enough that she knew his tea order by heart: two pinches of sugar and way too much milk. After mixing up the drink and setting it on his side of the table, she nervously watched his shaking hands pick up the tea. He choked down a few sips before giving up and setting the cup back on the table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Falsie,” he whispered, utter defeat in his tone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What in the world do you have to be sorry for?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That you have to see me like this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Amory,” she sighed, “what is going on? You know that you can tell me anything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The admin’s gaze drifted to the floor as he let out a long breath. That was also the same moment that False noticed a small red stain on the collar of his cream sweater. Her mind was too sharp not to know what that might have meant, but she still tried to brace herself for whatever Amory was about to say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“SieSie, I… I have hanahaki.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In her mind, False swore nearly every curse word she knew. Outwardly, though, she remained perfectly still and silent, her paling skin the only indicator that she had actually heard what he had said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How long?” she finally muttered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Two weeks. It’s not too far along, but it’s already wrecking me,” Amory admitted, still not taking his eyes off the ground.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The single word echoed around the room, not receiving an answer. At first, False thought that he hadn’t heard it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Amory, who is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, she truly read his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh no.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh no no no no no.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” she whimpered. “No, no, no.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry,” he answered, breaking into a sob.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Void, no. How can the universe be this damn cruel?” False choked out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s, it’s not your fault,” she sniffled, feeling the tears ready to spill out of her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the hell are we going to do?” he cried, tears already streaming down his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll figure it out. It’s all we can do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dammit!” Amory yelled. “I hate all of this! Why did I have to fall in love? Why can't I be like you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Trust me, Ammy; it hurts me, too,” she weakly replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, the little cottage became merely a container to hold all of the tears the two were rapidly shedding. False didn’t trust herself to be able to find her way home in this state, so she remained in that chair until she eventually fell asleep from exhaustion, same as Amory. The first wave of shock had gone, but the pain and misery were just getting started. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t until the next morning that the two returned to the elephant in the room. They needed that time to eat a meal, get some sleep, and calm down their wildly raging emotions. Once the shock had passed, it was time to deal with the storm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Falsie, we need to decide what to do,” Amory finally spoke up. That nickname had different connotations to False now, but she didn’t feel like trying to make him stop calling her that. The poor guy was dealing with enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so sorry that I can’t cure you,” she whispered, an annoying lump still present in her throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. I knew that from the very start,” he answered, unable to keep the sadness out of his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are the options?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can take a potion that removes the disease, but it will take my emotions with it. Or, I can just…” Neither wanted Amory to finish that sentence, so he merely trailed it off. “You know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you want to do?” False quietly asked, biting her lip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Honestly, I don’t want to be a robot. Even if I’m not mechanical, me without emotions isn’t… it isn’t me,” he choked out.</span>
</p><p><span>“And I don’t know if I could bear looking at you and knowing that it’s </span><em><span>my</span></em> <em><span>fault</span></em><span> you’re a robot,” False added, swallowing hard and shifting in her chair. “It’ll hurt everyone if you go, and it’ll hurt everyone if you stay. There’s no easy choice to make.”</span></p><p>
  <span>She knew that he would die either way. Physically, if they did nothing. Mentally, if they did the one thing they could. There was no option C where he was miraculously cured in a happily-ever-after scenario. There were only two roads of sorrow at a fork in the road and thick fog concealing the long-term consequences of each one.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Amory was the one to break the silence, not sounding hopeful, but rather a weary resignation to a fate that she hoped she would never have to see anyone else experience.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“SieSie, I have an idea.” </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>After that conversation, Amory and False spent nearly every day together. If it wasn’t common knowledge that False was aro, it would have been assumed that the two had fallen in love. However, they did venture out sometimes to visit other members of the server, always together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In his cottage, he taught False everything he knew about being an admin. There was a lot of information in Amory’s brain, but she picked up things rather quickly. Soon, she could fix any bug, piece together complex syntax off the top of her head, and do Amory’s job better than he could himself. That was rather crucial, as he grew weaker every day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It hurt beyond all belief to see him deteriorate daily, knowing that there was absolutely nothing she could do to help him. For a while, they kept it secret, as they didn’t want anyone worrying about Amory. However, he eventually started to grow flowers on his skin, and they knew that they couldn’t hide it anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a very sad day when they held a server-wide meeting, informing everyone about Amory’s condition. The others freaked out, desperately trying to figure out who Amory had fallen for. He refused to tell them, knowing that they would likely turn on False in an irrational fit of shocked anger if they knew. Plus, he just wanted them to enjoy the remaining time that they had with him, which was only three weeks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>During that time, he visited every server member and tried to enjoy life the best he could. False needed to help him with nearly everything, but she called it her penance for being the reason Amory was going to die. The server members had varied reactions when he told them it would be his last visit. Some people gave long monologues about how much the admin had done for them, others wanted to do stuff with Amory to take their mind off the situation, and some just wanted a long hug. There was not a single dry eye in any of those conversations.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When his last day finally came, the entire server was gathered at his bedside, smiling through their tears as Amory choked out a goodbye to all of them. There was a smile on his face as he sucked in his last breath, and False knew that she would never forget the complicated brew of emotions coursing through her that day. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had taken his life away, and he had given her everything of him in return. It wasn’t fair. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Life wasn’t fair.</span>
  </em>
  <span> The universe was cruel. </span>
  <em>
    <span>The universe was random. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Everything… hurt. <br/><br/></span>
</p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>The admin console room was silent for a good long while, False’s chilling words echoing around the small box. Xisuma felt rather weighty, having been trusted with this dark aspect of the past of one of his hermits. This type of confession had happened to him many times before, but he would never get used to the mixture of horror, empathy, and guilt coursing through him in those moments.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Void, I’m… I’m so sorry, False,” he whispered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It took me a long time to heal,” she added. “Amory was my mentor, my teacher, and my best friend. He knew that I couldn’t fall in love with him, and he didn’t try to make me. He taught me everything he knew about admin work and directed me to people who knew more than him. He showed me how to take care of others like he did and build those long-lasting connections. He is a big reason why I am who I am today.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>False’s icy blue eyes were fixed to the ground, slightly off to the side and never focusing on Xisuma. He’d never seen such sorrow portrayed in her expression, as she masked it so well. Now that she’d let her guard down, he could recognize all those times in the past where she had been hurting, but had been extremely careful that no one else noticed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I ran the server for a year or so, but I could soon sense that it was time for everyone to move on. Axiomcraft was associated with Amory’s death, and we had found other places to call home. We ended it on good terms and still occasionally talk.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did they ever find out that it was you?” Xisuma questioned, keeping his voice low so as to not disturb the fragile atmosphere of the room and her willingness to talk.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Some did,” she nodded. “They were angry at first, but eventually came to terms with it. I remember who took the news the worst to this day.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who?” The word slipped out automatically, and the admin hoped that she wouldn’t take him as a prying creep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was actually Mumbo, Amory’s brother. He was on Axiomcraft for a while, and he took Amory’s death very hard, as to be expected. We both came to Hermitcraft and were good friends for a while due to our shared past. When he figured it out, we had a huge argument and didn’t speak for a long while. In time, he cooled off, apologized, and started talking to me again,” False explained nonchalantly. “It was a time I’d rather not speak of, though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I see,” he muttered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,” she began, suddenly perking up and returning back to her normal, guarded self. “Long story short, I learned my admin knowledge from Amory, the admin of my old server. And X, you said you would go to sleep when my story was done. Do I need to tuck you in?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyes were twinkling with a hint of mischievousness and motheriness now, which he chuckled at.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I’ll go to bed now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright. Good night, dear,” she sweetly smiled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“See ya later, False.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Xisuma slowly walked out of his admin console room, a yawn escaping his lips. Entering his cozy bedroom, he plopped on top of the mattress and wrapped himself up in the blankets. He fell asleep almost instantly from the exhaustion of working for so long. The sleepiness masked the slight taste of blood in his mouth, not to be revealed just yet to the admin. There was time, after all. There was always supposedly time.</span>
</p>
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